By: Rajendra Kapil

The greatest difference between the Ramcharitmanas and the Valmiki Ramayana is that the Valmiki Ramayana presents every event in remarkable detail. It explores the emotions of every character with extraordinary depth. Sage Valmiki examined each character closely and gave powerful expression to their inner feelings. As we will see in this article, when Hanuman Ji was searching for Sita Ji in Lanka, he went through immense emotional turmoil. In his despair, he even thought that it would be better to give up his life there rather than return unsuccessful.

In the Ramcharitmanas, this episode appears in the Sundarkand section. Tulsidas Ji concluded it within just a few verses. Hanuman Ji first meets Vibhishan, who informs him that Sita Ji is in the Ashok Vatika. Hanuman Ji then directly proceeds there and receives the darshan of Mother Sita.

Juguti Vibhishan sakal sunai, chalau pavansut bida karai
Kar soi roop gayau puni tahava, ban Ashok Sita rah jahava

And Hanuman Ji reached the Ashok Vatika.

Dekhi manahi mahu keenh pranama, baithehi beeti jat nisi jama
Krus tanu sees jata ik beni, japati hriday Raghupati gun shreni

Sita Ji’s body had grown weak from the agony of separation. Day and night, she appeared immersed in the remembrance of Lord Ram with deep sorrow in her heart. Seeing her condition, Hanuman Ji became deeply distressed. The episode ends within these few verses.

But when one studies the Valmiki Ramayana, it becomes clear that Hanuman Ji had to struggle immensely before reaching Sita Ji. During this process, he endured many moments of despair. What thoughts crossed his mind in those painful moments becomes evident in the following shlokas.

Bhuyishtham lodita Lanka Ramasya charatah priyam |
Na hi pashyami Vaideheem Sitam sarva anga shobhanam || 5-13-3

“I have searched all of Lanka in search of Sita, yet I have not been able to find the beautiful Vaidehi anywhere.”

Hanuman Ji feared that perhaps his great effort of crossing the ocean would go in vain. He then began worrying about Sita Ji’s safety.

Upari upari va noonam sagaram kramatah tada || 5-13-10
Viveshtamana patita samudre Janak atmaja

“Could Sita Ji have fallen from the Pushpak Viman into the ocean while being brought here?”

“Did Sita Ji sacrifice her life while trying to escape Ravana’s grasp?”

“Did she jump into the ocean from the aerial route to protect her honor?”

Ha Ram Lakshman iti eva ha Ayodhye iti cha Maithili || 5-13-14
Vilapya bahu Vaidehi nyasta deha bhavishyati |

“Crying out ‘O Ram! O Lakshman! O Ayodhya!’ perhaps the grieving Sita gave up her life in despair.”

Hanuman Ji remained tormented by these thoughts for a long time. Then another fear entered his mind — if Sita Ji could not be found, this terrible news could never be conveyed to Lord Ram. The sorrow would utterly devastate Him. Hanuman Ji thought that he could not return to Kishkindha after such failure. It would be better to die there itself. His despair had reached its peak. He was even prepared for death.

Then began another chain of thoughts in his mind. He wondered what effect the news of his failure would have on everyone connected to Lord Ram.

Gatva tu yadi Kakutstham vakshyami param apriyam || 5-13-23
Na drishta iti maya Sita tatah tyakshyanti jeevitam |

“If I deliver this tragic news to Lord Ram, He will not be able to bear the separation. It is possible He may even give up His life.”

“And if Lord Ram gives up His life, then Lakshman Ji, who loves his elder brother more than his own life, will not remain behind either.”

Vinashtau bhratarau shrutva Bharato api marishyati || 5-13-26
Bharatam cha mritam drishtva Shatrughno na bhavishyati |

“If the news of the deaths of these two brothers reaches Ayodhya, Bharat and Shatrughna will also not survive.”

Putran mritan sameekshya atha na bhavishyanti matarah || 5-13-27
Kausalya cha Sumitra cha Kaikeyi cha na sanshayah |

“The news of the deaths of all four sons will shatter the three mothers. In the absence of their sons, Mother Kausalya, Mother Sumitra, and Mother Kaikeyi may also not survive.”

This chain of thought did not end there.

Hanuman Ji then wondered: “Will my king Sugriv remain alive after hearing of Ram Ji’s death? If something happens to Sugriv, what will become of his wife Ruma? Will Crown Prince Angad survive this grief? And in such a terrible crisis, when the leaders of the Vanar race are gone, how will the Vanar army or the Vanar community itself survive?”

The mere thought of the destruction of the entire Vanar race shook Hanuman Ji deeply. Beyond this, he could think no further. His body weakened under the weight of despair. When he regained some composure, he concluded that it would be better not to return at all than to return in failure. He decided that after spending some time there, he would give up his life in Lanka itself, but would not become the cause of such catastrophic destruction.

Only a great sage like Valmiki could portray the inner conflict of Hanuman Ji with such subtlety and emotional depth.

Through Hanuman Ji, Valmiki Ji masterfully depicted the terrifying mental state created by despair and failure. This is the beauty and strength of the Valmiki Ramayana. These very emotions awaken devotion and reverence in the hearts of devotees of Lord Ram.

“Jai Shri Ram”